It appears that officers up in the broad acres of North Yorkshire have been serving the wrong kind of sandwiches. Police Review’s article on this grave matter thoughtfully featured a photograph of the ham sandwich which, it appears, caused widespread offence in the Northallerton area. It was not made clear quite who has been so grievously offended by the aforementioned morsel gate-crashing an otherwise joyful and harmonious community luncheon. However it is safe to assume that someone in the ivory towers of Newby Wiske Hall has concluded that someone, somewhere potentially might have been, even if no-one actually was. Neither does anyone get round to explaining why North Yorkshire Police give out free food. The solution is to send every single community officer, from CSO to Chief Inspector, on a sandwich course which takes ‘between six and eight months’, presumably at the taxpayers’ expense. Officers will have ‘protected time’ to concentrate on their sandwich-making. At least they will get a lunch break, unlike most of their colleagues who are out and about dealing with emergencies whilst they spend their ‘protected time’ concocting politically correct recipes. The good news is that, once Sir Ronnie’s recommendations are implemented, they will have a great future with McDonalds. Who says there is no such thing as a free lunch?